A New J&J is in town!!

A new J&J is in town. It’s Jo & Jo…eh…to be premise, it’s Jo(anne) & Jo(seph) kekek…a budding love is in the making and the latest news were crazy!! He made the 1st move!! I shall not take the glory of announcing it. Shall leave it to the owner to tell you folks. Kekeke… :p

Seems like my bestest friends have ‘J’ in their names. Jed & Jess and now, Jo & Jo. I’m fated with Js and the number 17. hahah…coz my previous girlfriends’ and my wife’s birthday falls on 17th. What are the odds!!!??? Unbelievable. It’s more than 1/1,000,000. it’s more like 1/1,000,000,000!! Anyway, I’m not important now. Everyone’s been fast to tie the knot. Another girlfriend of mine may hold her wedding this year-end. Seems like everyone is rushing into this. Is it the “clock’s” ticking or the ultimate act of love? I’ll let u decide.

In a nutshell, all love is great. Pursue it and you shall reap rewards. You go, girl!!

A Modern Day Peter Pan..can I truly be one??

I feel the need to write. Write about anything. Need to get the “thing” out of my system! What thing, I don’t know, but I know I just need to write to relieve myself of this boredom, stifle-ness, and more locally apt, sian-ness. Whenever I feel this way, I’ll write. Either this or watch my tv and play Football Manager at the same time. In the past, I would go to the arcade and shoot some bad guys, but now I seldom do that. Maybe becoz I’m working and no time for that anymore. Somehow I always credit all the restrictions and bad phenomenon on her. I just feel bitter lah. Marriage seems to restrict my life instead of enriching it. Now I realize I’m not suited for this holy matrimony. At least not now. Not in the next 5 years.

I don’t wanna blame her for the rest of our lives together. I may become (but highly unlikely) a wife-beater eventually. If that’s the case, she better move aside before I transform into that, sooner rather than later.

I’m feeling vexed about my marriage ever since we tied the knot. Even more so in the last few months. There’s really a knot in my chest, waiting for me to untie. Only me. I can’t breathe at times and I feel I’m going crazy. I just can’t take this lying down. It’s like forcing it down my throat. I reckon no one can understand what I’m going through except those who have been in my shoes, and I don’t expect my pals to understand as well. It’s way out of their league and rather not imposes on them on such matters. I still want them to view me as the fun-loving and jovial guy who brings joy rather than gloom and sadness. I want to be Nick again. The same Nick 5 years back and even 10 years back. He’s such a nicer person and down to earth. And he still is! But now, he’s hiding within the other Nicks’ that I portray everyday to other people. He’s suffering and I’ll try to bring him out whenever I can and as long as I can. I’m trying to cut down the number of façades, to show people the real me, but mostly just take advantage and the real Nick will just hide back in the closet.

I liken myself as the modern day Peter Pan. The kid who refuses to grow up and ignored the things that they expect him to know. On the outside, I’m maturing (i.e. getting older), but on the inside, I’m still a kid. A kid with little expectations and fun is the appetizer, entrée and dessert, every single day! I’m still not prepared to be an adult. I can father a child, but he/she would most likely to be me. Another Peter Pan or Wendy. I would want them to grow up in a restriction-less environment and let their creativity runs wild. I want them to have the things that I can’t have and beyond. At the same time, teach them the ways of the world to prevent others from hurting them. Always be truthful to oneself and live life to the fullest. That should be their motto for life, not mine. ‘coz mine’s always decided…It can’t be undone…I’m weak and I caused the downfall of myself and I blame no one.

All said and done, I wouldn’t want my children to be like me, would I?

Irene's 30th Birthday

Yesterday, celebrated Irene’s 30th birthday. The big 3 ‘O’. The location was perfect as the amenities were of abundance and lotsa shopping for the girls. Most importantly, everyone had a good time. :)

Deep down, I was actually relieved. Relieved, because I’ve come full circle in terms of organizing birthday parties for every single friend (close ones) of mine, including hers. A giant load was removed and I felt liberated, literally. I feel I’ve done my part and it’s time for me to die. There’s nothing more I can contribute and it’s time. Time for me to seek greener pasture and start this cycle again. It’s like I’m Charlize Theron in Sweet November, whereby she’s dying and seek a new man every month to help them realize the simpler things in life and spend time with their family and loved ones, instead of digging in their heels deep in their work. When the time’s up, she’ll let him go and he becomes a better man.

She’s selfless and only wanting the world to be a better place with the little time she has on Earth. I totally feel her thoughts and being in her shoes is tough, but someone has to do the dirty job. I just feel it gotta be me :p I hope I can carry on that legacy with whatever capacity I have and help as much as I can.

Love is Sweet..Hot & Sexy..I WANNA FALL IN LOVE ALL OVER AGAIN!!

I wanna fall in love all over again!! I even dreamt about it last night! The setting was in Paris @ an al fresco café along the riverside. So idyllic, so comforting. Somehow, I always dreamt of Caucasian girls. Oh well, they are my dream partners all this while. Kekeek…it’s all Jo’s fault! All the talking about the thrill of budding relationship makes me drool with envy. Hahahah…but I’m really happy for her. Happy that she found a new love (I got a gut feeling it will bear fruit. Confirm!) and a new goal in life. She’s gushing with “awwwww” and “ahhhh” whenever the doctor is asked or mentioned. 1st time on the phone and it lasted 45mins! What does that tell you my friends? It’s OBVIOUS!! Both of them are obviously attracted to one another. Awwwwwwwww, it’s so sweet….I can’t take it. I WANNA BE IN HER SHOES ALSO!! The infatuation of romance is so strong that sex can’t hold a candle to it. So good hor…I wish I can be in her shoes.

Just hope she’s gonna have a wonderful life hereafter. ; )

Happy 2008!!

Happy New Year everyone!! 1st day to work and I’m already sick. Kekeek..just came back from the doc’s. Taking a MC tomorrow. Yipppeee!!

Got a surprise today from my baby sis. She gave me a day free trial @ Fitness First. So sweet rite…but other fitness centres gives more than a day. Normally a week or 3 months. Quite stingy hor. :p But nonetheless, I’m going next Friday after work. Yve will be there, so hopefully I can bump into her :)

The year kickstart to a pretty decent start. Just hope it will gain momentum and can only gets better.

Hmmm…hope I can gain more girlfriends lik Jo, i.e. share the same mentality, personality (craziness and easy-going) & love shopping!! I just feel these people keeps me happy and hope I can get to know them..hopefully :p Oh ya!! And she must stay within 1km of my home radius..hahahaha..it’s not impossible. Just need more effort & LOTSA LOTSA Luck.

Kudos to my dearest girlfriend, baby sista, good buddies for being here for me in 2007 and continuing to stay here in 08 as well. Love ya lots!!

LIFE

Ain’t Life great! Think about it. It’s the only thing in the whole wide world that gives you 2nd chance in your life. Not even your girlfriend/boyfriend does it without thinking twice. Life’s has its means and ways to let you in on the little secrets of this planet, and you’ll get to know a little more of yourself everyday. It’s self-discovery everyday! It’s your own Truman Show. :p Ya ya…is it making sense to you?! Kekeke…I’m smart right… :p so after all, I’m not a himbo. Hahahha…

We don’t have to complicate matters by twisting and turning the same ol’ issue/problem day in day out. Draw out the “main” point, decide whether it’s worth your time to make/break and get on with it. You’ll suddenly feel time is more flexible and you can do more things!! Life’s simple, don’t make a fuss out of it. LOVE LIFE!! LOVE ME!! (me represents yourself, but I don’t mind more people loving me. Kekeke…)

This thought just came into my mind and I thought I just share with you guys. Ehhh…only a handful who bothers to read my uninteresting blog, i.e. Jo, Yve & HS. :) I’m not that popular, you know :( Anyway, keep that in mind and it might make your Life simpler, easier and happier. Perk up!! Life’s GREAT, go out and have fun!!

p.s. see why I put a capital “L” in Life. It’s real important and you should love it more than anything. Love thy neighbours, friends, strangers and family. Keep it real folks ; )

National Treasure...Brings out the patriotism in me..

Had a great party on the Eve of X’mas. Partied till 4am and hit the sack. It was really really fun and everyone was enjoying themselves. Everyone sang to his or her hearts content, except HS…poor girl. She was sick and hope she recovered fast. :)

This year, I was in the mood of giving (as the Chinese like to say, “too much money, don’t know where to spend” mood) and bought everyone I love and born with, a prezzie. Including my couz! I reckon it’s my 1st time. Received lotsa this year and I truly adore all these people. People who love me all year round and since I was born. I LOVE YOU GUYS TOO!!!! Muuuaaaccckkkk!!

Went to watch National Treasure yesterday. It didn’t fail me. The story was intriguing and as expected, kept me at the edge of the seat, literally. I guess there’s a part 3. Can’t wait for the next installment!!! The script writers are damn bloody GOOD!! Go watch it if you still not yet done it. I guaranteed you wouldn’t regret it. ; )

Actually this posting was due yesterday, but my sis's lappie went down, so my dad gotta use the connection to repair. Anyway, I'm just glad I FINALLY gotta post it..Aaaaarrrrggghhh...kekeeke.. :p

NYE here I come!!!

Mad X'mas Shopping!! & I dreamt of my sista...kekekek

Actually this is an overdue posting. Kekekek…writing this JUST for Yve. ‘coz I dreamt about her 2 nights back and it’s due to the fact that she called me in the day. Weird rite? Hahahah…anyway it really nice to dream of my baby sista and how I wish it’s real. ; ) oh ya, and she’s really hot now!!! Just chat with her through MSN and you can see her display picture is totally pro-looking and HOT!!! But she just played it down and be humble. Silly girl. :p so if any guys wanna chat her up, contact her through me!!! You wouldn’t regret it. ; )

My 1st day of work back from my trip is really slack. Though piled up high with papers and emails, I selectively chose those that require my attention and left the rest till Mon. I’m too distracted with the season to be jolly and shopping!! Hahahah…went shopping again yesterday, but it’s for my couz. Only bought CDs for myself. My back’s hurting and have to cut short my trip loh. So sad man. Still have Suntec, Marina Sq, Bugis Street to conquer!! Hmmm…looks like I can only go after X’mas. Post X’mas SALE!!! Hahahaha…I’m going crazy now..stupid sales everywhere!! Aaarrrggghhh…..kekeekek :p

Back from Shanghai!

I’m back from Shanghai!! It’s pretty chilly over there…It’s my maiden voyage over there, so a bit sua ku. Kekeke…1st day was about 5 deg, 2nd was hovering 5-10 and today is the hottest at 15 deg, and you only need a thermal wear and a normal jacket will do. Lounging the thick coat is bloody heavy. Anyway that’s not the point.

Had a great time seeing the culture and the people. Friendly and polite. And my supplier and his employees are sweethearts. They treat you like king and always have your best interest in mind. Was somehow humbled by the experience and would look forward to going there to meeting them and knowing them on a deeper level. Nice people :)

Hopping Mad!!

BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m bloody pissed with the weather, man…I didn’t take leave just to stay home!! I need to do my shopping!! Aaaarrrggghhhh!!! The whole day is raining non-stop. Don’t know when will stop. The shitty weather starts since the turn of the month. Unbelievable!! Nothing to say liao. Too mad to write. :<

Life: Leaders or Supporting Cast

Everyone has a role to play and that’s the way we are created. Just like in the movies, there are the leading man, supporting cast, director, screen-writers, lighting guys, props team etc, it applies to life as well. Not everyone can be the lead actor. Some are more suited to be supporting cast, just like me! :p I know that ever since I’m in my poly project teams. I’m a very good assistant to the leader, but not a good leader. I always feel that I can build on an idea but never come up with an initial brilliant suggestion. So, I’m resigned to being 2nd class and know my place in life. To me, leaders are born, not cultivated. No matter how hard you train the person, he just can’t succeed that leadership role because he’s just not built for that role in life.

But don’t be despair. Leaders can’t do their job well without his trusty side-kick. He’s the one who organize the nitty gritty details so that the leader can perform and sell to the crowd. That’s why Soon and me are always great partners. We know when to excel and when to retreat to optimize one another’s strengths and cover one’s weakness.

But there are times whereby the supporting cast has to step up if the leader is gone and out. It’s the time to perform and it takes lotsa guts and determination to make the rest convince you can be a leader. For e.g. I was pushed to become a leader in my final year of undergrad studies. No choice, ‘coz after the 1st group meeting, I know I can’t count on my mates to lead and do the work. So, I stepped up and lead their thru. I pumped in double the effort to ensure my team succeeds, and WE DID!! So I was very proud with the end results and got pretty decent grades. That was my defining moment. If only I can capture that on film. Kekeke…

So, enough said. Everyone needs everyone. No one can perform without each other. You can’t live in a world of pure leaders or vice versa. It has to be a balance. It’s the whole eco system of life. Just like a food chain. Some are the prey and some are the hunter. No prey, no hunter. Simple?

I still love myself for who I am. Laid back, always looking cool, but when the time for me to step up, I know I can do the job. So, for the time being, I’ll just let the others shine while I support them wholeheartedly and happily. ; )

2nd break-up in 2 weeks..

Tracy just broke off with her boyfriend. It’s the 2nd break-up in 2 weeks!! Sheesshh…What?! Is this the month of break-ups or the best thing to do before the New Year. I could join their club before year-end as well. Hmmm…

I think of it as freeing oneself from misery, since both parties are unhappy and what’s the point of staying together? It can be just liberating as skinny dippy!! Life is all about getting together and parting. It need not be sad and solemn. It’s just that the time is up and it’s time to move on to other things..other happier things. Sadness is the first thing that creep up and tears are natural and free. Cry for all you want, but it’s a form of liberation too. After the tears dried up, you are the same o’person that we know. If both parties can’t see eye to eye anymore, or their ideals aren’t at the equilibrium, the alternative route is “exit”. I know it’s the easy way out, but why make things difficult for each other and drag the whole issue for months and even years. (as if I’m talking about myself…kekeek..) JUST DO IT. Period!!

It’s not the end of the world. Suit up and hit the track. Sports, shopping and traveling is the BEST-EST way to beat this and boredom. Rope in your girlfriends or guy pals and you have yourself a rolling good time!!! Woooooo!!! Hahahaha…Jo, let’s go shopping!! Kekeke… :p

My 1st 42.195km medal!!!

Completed my 1st (hopefully not my last) marathon!!! Woooo!!! It’s a FANTASTIC feeling crossing the finishing line. Especially when you preserved with 2 of your bestest friends of 10 years, it makes it the more sweeter. The crowd’s gone, and there no cheering but we still are more than happy to indulge in our own world of happiness and joy. Soon and JC had busted knees and I had busted ankles. It’s bad, real bad. Soon couldn’t even walk after the race. And bloody hell, there’s no available cabs in sight, so have to dial for one.

We had a bad tan but it’s worth it. Hahahha…it’s been a long time since I went for one :p Oh ya, we finished in 8hrs 15mins. I could have finished ahead of time but definitely without my pals by my side. We stopped at 19km and WALKED the rest home. That’s 23km of heat, sweat and dragging our battered bodies. I could psycho myself past the pain barrier and ran at least another 5-10km, then I’m done, but we made a pact to finish together, and we did :)

I’m pretty sure we are the last few that made it back alive. Coz if you’re at the back, it’s all the injured participants who die die want to cross the line and get their winner’s tee and medals. Commendable!!! Old uncles, aunties, they are all zooming past us and we can only watch. Hahah…

Now that I had completed 2 categories of the 3, the next event will be 21km. *must complete the trilogy ma…kekeke* Then after completing all 3 events, it’s freestyle and can complete in any category I want. Hahahah…that’s what we 3 decided during our run.

So next year, Jo, Irene, Ser, Jess and maybe HS you can join us for the run and we can have lunch after that!! I promise we will not come in 8hrs. hahaha…in fact when we past the 19km mark, it’s only 3hrs, so it’s a pretty decent result ; )

Till next Dec for our annual marathon running!! Start training now, girls!! :p

Best Birthday EVER!!! 2007 is a year to REMEMBER!!

Rui En believes in this and I guess it makes A LOT of sense. Quote:

“you try to be somebody for everybody, but in the end, you are nothing to yourself”.

It’s something along this line. It’s very true man. Everyday life, you try to be a son, father, boyfriend, husband to someone that she wants or hope you to become, that you lose your self-identity and become an empty shell. You don’t know what you really want to be for YOURSELF. So this ties in with my earlier quote of “you are only responsible for your own happiness”. Only God can bring happiness to everyone, not us, mere mortals. Let him go wonders. He only created us to be responsible to oneself and no one else except to Him.

Very interesting quotes I’d heard recently. Maybe it’s showing me a sign that it’s time to take action, and it’s the “best” time to do it. I’m bidding for the right time and hope for the best. You guys, especially Jo, should know what I’m talking about ya? My marriage.

Anyway, received another FANTASTIC prezzie today. It's the very nice and very expensive Korea Soccer Jacket. It costs $109 man!!! It's very very very sweet of the guys. Really touched that they make a point to make me feel special when they are busy with their exams and work. It's definitely the year to remember. :) They are the best-est friends any human being can get!! You guys win hands-down!! and feet too!! keekekek...I'm really really humbled and greatest honour to have you guys as friends in this lifetime. I really am :) Hope our friendship will last this whole lifetime and strengthen as time grew old with us. Hurray to our bond!! (this goes out to Jo, Soon, Jess, HS & Serene) Thank you thank you thank you!! love you guys to bitssssssssssssss!!!!

Wish me speedy recovery for Sunday's 42km marathon..

Was sick from Monday until today. Feeling MUCH MUCH better!! My company doc suspects I may have stomach ulcer :( But I totally agree with him too. Most probably I’ll go back to him after the marathon to do the scope. *Company pay ma…kekeke.. :p*

Even when I’m sick, I still insist on recovering my health back and go for Sunday’s marathaon. 42km!! No joke man!! Now I need my health and strength back before Sat, or else it will be very very difficult.

Wish me good health and speedy recovery, girlfriends!! ; )

It's my 25th BIRTHDAY!!

*here's the pics of my shopping and caking cutting "ceremony"...kekeke:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! I’m a quarter of a century old!!! Steady right…kekekek…only 25 lah!! :p In my years on Earth, this year is the ONLY year that I received the most prezzies!!! Yiiipppeeee!!! I LOVE them all!! Coz it’s a gift from the heart :)

Here’s the low-down of my lovely gifts:

1. Tee & ear-rings from Irene
2. Cuff-links & “Love” letter from Jo
3. Polo Tee & Roses from Tracy
4. “Tiramisu” cake from Yve
5. A surprise gift from Annie (Irene’s friend and yet to receive..)

and various red packets from my folks and my grandparents :). And today, after a good dinner at the zi char stall opposite my block, we had cakes!! YES! 2 cakes!! One is a hazelnut chocolate cake from my sis and another is a blackforest from Irene. And they both taste FANTASTIC!! But I’m more inclined towards the hazelnut. Kekeke…v v v v NICE!!

And yesterday after our collection of the race packs, walked about the Sports Expo. Then spotted a water-bag & sunglasses!! It’s bloody nice & cheap loh. The bag only $48 complete with the bladder and the shades only $145 with 2 extra interchangeable lenses!!! Aaahhhh!!!! It’s a great deal to resist. So, I bought them today, just to buy these things. Then went Suntec to jalan jalan and bought this nail care kit from Israel. It’s those cart stall and surprisingly they have 3 other outlets in Singapore, i.e. Great World, J8 and Vivo. Anyway, it’s 45bucks for 1 set and 2 for 90. So I got 1 for myself & 1 for Irene. SHIOK!! Today I’m super broke liao…hahaha…but it’s worth it ; ) definitely going there again to replenish my stock when I’m done. They have other dead sea products as well. Kinda reasonable price and they have a website as well, so it’s pretty easy to know their products. Try it, it’s http://www.vardimigdal.com/. And I don’t have commission by recommending this. Hahahah… :p

And i was talent spotted again!! kekeke...It's my 3rd time. Anyway I gave that guy my no. but I'm not going to go for anything. Just feel shiok about getting spotted again, means I'm handsome!! kekeek.. :p

Ok lah, I need to polish my nails now!!

Met my ex & Justin's in trouble..

Knocked into Lee Ann today at Amoy food centre! Actually didn’t notice her, but from a distance, I can sense that there’s a babe in front, so when I look up, it was her…hahahah…my 1st reaction was, “What should my reaction be?”. Coz our last conversation was that she’s pissed that I kept delaying our dinner, but it turned out ok. We said hi’s and she’s looking good, but her complexion may have been a tad off. Kekeke…anyway everything’s ok. At least she’s smiling at me :)

There’s always 2 sides to a coin. When there’s a good thing, there’s always a bad thing happening soon. It turns out to be Justin. His relationship with his girlfriend has taken a toil. Most likely they are breaking up soon. Hope everything’s ok with him. The last time when his girlfriend initiated the break-up, he just teared when I asked him. It’s my 1st time seeing a guy cry. He’s very much in love with his girl then. But now, his girl is giving out signals that they should part ways. I feel it’s good for him, coz in his current state, he’s like having no girlfriend. She’s practically working everyday and when she’s on off, they barely spend 24 hours together. Oh well, I just hope he will be ok and keep himself occupied.

Another Pressie!!

Had received my “real” gift from Tracy. She bought me a Tommy Hilfiger polo tee!! It’s costs a bomb man…coz she passed me the receipt in case the size doesn’t fit and need to exchange. Hahhaah…1st time I know how much my birthday pressie costs.. kekeke…but she a keen eye. Even she haven’t seen me for soooooooo long, she still manages to guess my size. Not too bad my girlfriend…hahahah… :p

Nothing much to say. Only my pressies for this month…kekeke..more to come??

Self Reflection...and it's from TV!!

This morning was watching the show, 7th Heaven, and this phrase really struck me:

“You are only responsible for your own happiness.”

People will always be heart-broken when a relationship fails, and tears are inevitable. But it's alrite. It's not your fault if things aren't going your way and everyone may see you are the "bad guy". You don't have to answer to any of them, only to YOURSELF. I feel that we can always reflect on this when we are confused or on wits end. If you can’t be happy, how can you spread it to others, i.e. you loved ones, friends etc. Hmmm…I’m beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel. After hearing this, everything becomes simpler and less confusing. Nothing matters more than my own happiness. Every other thing will take care of itself and time will heal all wounds. I hope all the people who are experiencing what I'm going through, to be able to find strength through his/her friends and family and also through the things they do. :)

See! Who say TV is a bad thing…you can learn a thing or two from watching TV 24/7. hahahah…

My BIRTHDAY!!!

Had a very hectic week..a lot of urgent stuff and was busy like a bee. Even went to work this morning, which only applies when I’ve tons to do. But it’s alrite, I don’t mind coz the workload is really great this time of the year.

But my week was sweet coz I received a birthday prezzie from Yve!! It was the 1st thing I see when I came back yesterday. My mum even sms me that I’ve a parcel. Didn’t know who’s the sender until I opened it. It is a tiramisu cake!!! It’s fake of coz..but it was damn real!! She’s e sweetest sista ever!!! Hahahahah…really very touched coz she’s know doing her FYP and her exams are near, so it makes it the more sweeter!! ; )

So far, I’ve received 2 prezzies. Had a nice bouquet from Tracy and now, my sista’s “cake”. And come Mon, Tracy’s gonna pass me the “real” birthday gift…hahahahah…so happy!! 1st time received so many things. Really appreciated these people who remembered my day (and those who yet to pass me theirs…kekeek)…love ya guys!!

Can’t wait for Mon!!! Muackk!!